Around 100 members from the community attended an ICE forum at the Maclean Bowling Club on Sunday afternoon. The event was hosted by Maclean Neighbourhood Watch, to help raise awareness and give an overview on the insidious drug Crystal Methamphetamine, known as ICE. Guest speakers included Senior Constable Dave Fish (Crime Prevention Officer), Jo Stretton (Clinical Nurse Specialist – Stimulant Treatment Program at Grafton Hospital), Sergeant Mick Eaton (Maclean Police) and Sam Booker (Clinical Psychologist – North Coast Primary Health), addressed the crowd. An anonymous letter which was sent to the forum, with a request for it to be read out, relayed the harsh reality of the affect that this drug can have on normal families within our community. “Someone that I used to Know….. a mothers musings. It is all so complicated…this is what I tell my friends when they ask how things are going with my son and his addiction to Crystal Meth…commonly known as ICE. My son does not understand…he thinks everything is ok. It is not ok…it is all bizarre…he gets on the drug to escape the real world…he does not sleep or eat. In a few days he is on the come down…the tricky time…this is the period when he does eat and sleep and has no energy to even have a conversation. After a few days he starts to feel and act a little normal only it is not a real normal…to him it is… he wants to change … he wants to never touch the drug again… however the hold is too strong… stronger then close friends and family and self worth. His depression,anxiety and stress washes over him and to help the pain… he self medicates with the gear and so he feels good about his world. Everything falls down around him… he won’t take phone calls from friends or family… because he is ashamed and isolated… he wont open mail or keep appointments. He thinks everything is ok! I get glimpses of my normal son… it hurts because it is only temporary… that other person will eventually take his place and destroys my calm… I cannot escape to my own surrounds… as he occupies that space. He is two people and I hate him for that… strong words coming from a once loving mother… how could I possibly feel this way? I have always been a protector and one who nurtures. Who have I become because of this drug? A drug I never took, however it controls my world. It dictates every thought and decision I make… IT CONTROLS MYSELF and MY ENVIRONMENT. His father God love him… thinks he can save him…. I did once… ONLY HE CAN SAVE HIMSELF. My son cannot get off the roundabout… we call it Ground hog day. I never know what to expect from one day to the next…my waking thought each morning is “well we got though another day”… I sometimes feel my home is no longer a place of safety and warmth… then I give myself a shake and say… “This will not break us”…we will get through this and be a normal family again…my positive nature has been returned and damn it I will fight to the end… ANON”